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A nice woman named Sharon.

2007-06-06

Good evening Boys and Girls...

Tonight I was half watching a show on MSNBC and Don Cheadle was on talking both about the new "Oceans" movie - this one "13," and some of his experiences during recent a trip to Sudan and Darfur. Some of the clips and what he had to say about what he'd seen, was extremely disturbing...

But my mind went back to the first movie in the series, "Oceans 11," itself a updated version of a Rat Pack movie from the fifties or sixties. I forget which and I don't feel like Googling it.

I was recently divorced when "Oceans's 11" came out and I'd just hopped back into the dating scene. I'd somehow started seeing a cute woman named Sharon with whom I found myself smitten. She was bright and pretty, petite yet shapely and I was pleased to have stumbled into meeting her. One of our first dates involved seeing this movie, and we both enjoyed it.

Over a late dinner that evening she told me she was a recovering alcoholic, her reason for turning down the wine I'd offered to order. I was surprised, but I was glad to be around someone who didn't drink as I rarely drink myself and offered to get the wine more as a social courtesy than as something I wanted.

She'd been sober a year after being arrested for drunk driving and spending a weekend in jail. "Wow," I thought, "she doesn't SEEM like a drinker."

One night, a month or so later, I arrived at her appartment with some sort of carry-out dinner and, within a few seconds, smelled booze, not so much on her breath, but almost as though it was coming out of her pores.

I told her I couldn't be around her if she'd decided to drink. I wasn't being holier-than-thou. It's just that by then I'd heard any number of stories from her about what a problem it had been for her for many years.

She denied she'd been drinking but... well, she called the next day to tell me, yes, she'd "slipped." Would I please give her another chance?

I told her that it wasn't my place to offer her chances - it was her life - but once she'd done what she needed to do, she could call me again and we'd see what fate had in store.

A couple of weeks later, after a binge - from what her dad said - as she tried to maneuver the four steps down down to the front door of her lower flat, she had a seizure. Evidently she slipped and hit her head. She was found the next morning by her neighbor. She was just 40, and her two boys, who lived with their Dad, were twelve and fourteen at the time.

We didn't meet online, but she was one of the first people I chatted with regularly. In fact she's the person who actually helped me download an early version of messenger for Mac for the first time.

Still keep her name and pic on my yahoo messenger friends list, though she's been gone for over five years now. Amazing to me that Yahoo hasn't expunged her profile, but it's still there. She was a beautiful and accomplished woman and I sometimes still feel guilty for not staying in touch when she went through the last of what evidently was many many rough patches. Maybe I'd have been able to help. No telling, I guess.

I'm sure I'll think of her if I see "Oceans 13."


Be good to everyone.

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